Category: dementia


I need to apologize to Osyth. A few weeks ago in her blog, Half-Baked in Paradise, she wrote about moving. Something about her words broke my heart. Maybe it was this: My heart felt the leaden weight of sorrow because my safe-place, my home,… Continue Reading “Roots”


My father was reading Time magazine the other day. “Can you read the date of this?” he asked me when I came in the room. I squinted and read, “July 17, 2000.” “So it’s current,” he said. “No, Dad,” I told him. “This is… Continue Reading “Self-diagnosis”

Barefoot Girl

“Oh, I see you’re a barefoot girl this morning,” my father said, looking at my feet. I was indeed barefoot, as is often the case when I’m still in my pajamas. “A barefoot girl with shoes on,” he continued, smiling as he said it.… Continue Reading “Barefoot Girl”

Lost in the Hospital

Today I lost my father. No — it’s not what you think. I misplaced him, or he misplaced himself. It felt a little odd to tell people, “Umm… I can’t find my father.” He had a doctor’s appointment this morning, so I dropped him… Continue Reading “Lost in the Hospital”

Helpful Words

“It happens to all of us, you know,” someone said to me when I was talking about my father’s latest foggy episode. Yesterday morning, when my father was studying his watch, I asked him what time he had. “Hmmm,” he said, studying the hands… Continue Reading “Helpful Words”


Yesterday my father kept commenting on the fog. “I can’t believe how foggy it is out there,” he said every time he looked out the window. The dense fog lingered all day. When I went for my evening walk, a heavy mist still rested on the fields.… Continue Reading “Fog”

In the Parking Lot

I never know what I’m going to see in the parking lot at the local grocery store. In the village of Cooperstown, there is one — yes, only one — grocery store. I go there often. My father’s refrigerator is small, and we go… Continue Reading “In the Parking Lot”

Remembering Birthdays

Three years ago for my birthday I was in the wilds of the Texas hill country, without cell coverage and with minimal wifi. Laity Lodge is great that way because it allows guests to make real connections. But it was my birthday and I don’t… Continue Reading “Remembering Birthdays”

The Grandmother’s New Pants

A friend who is helping care for an elderly relative told me about one evening when she went to visit her aunt and she found her wearing no pants.  It reminded me of a poem I had written when my mother did something similar. Here’s my… Continue Reading “The Grandmother’s New Pants”

If You Say So

The following is an edited version of a post first published on January 2, 2012. I wrote it when my mother was still living at home and I was trying to help my father with her. My sister and I can carry on conversations using… Continue Reading “If You Say So”