My husband’s youngest brother, Ken, passed away last September in Kansas. The New York memorial service was held this past Friday.
Bud’s sister, Jeannie, gave a eulogy. It reminded me a little of my own words about my brother Stewart — how we all carry pieces of our loved ones with us.
In her eulogy, Jeannie said, “[Ken] was the kind of person who would buy a huge roll of paper, paint, a palette, and not brushes, but Marshmallow Peeps for his kids to paint with for Easter.” I loved that image of Ken — fun, creative, involved with his kids.
The day after Ken’s memorial service, we had a Zaengle family reunion. Bud is number two of thirteen children — plus a cousin came to live with them when her mother died.
So Bud’s parents raised fourteen children.
In a tiny house.
With one bathroom.
But I digress.
His father passed away over 10 years. Bud’s brother, Jack, passed away in 2007, and then Ken in 2017.
On Saturday I tried to sneak a photo while a real photographer was taking a group picture of the remaining nuclear family. Clearly, I am NOT a photographer — Tom’s face is hidden behind Jeannie’s pink hat, Don is half hidden by Joe, and Mary is all but obliterated by Anne. But here they are:
Maybe when the big group pictures are available, I’ll post one here.
I left the party early on Saturday to bring Mary to a “thing.” (Trust me, there WILL be a post about that at a future time.)
The next morning, Bud was telling me about what I missed in the evening.
“Ellie did the cutest thing,” he said. Ellie is Ken’s daughter.
Bud said, “She had a box full of little squares of yellow paper. She had drawn a picture on each one, and the picture told a story. She was handing them out and I got one of the last ones.”
He pulled it out of his pocket to show me.
“The person on the right,” Bud explained, “loves candy. He’s standing outside a candy store and looking in the window at all the candy. And he’s drooling because he wants to eat it all.”
I laughed.
And looked for the Peeps in the candy display.
Clearly, Peeps would not be found in the candy store though. They would be in the art store. With all the brushes.
I could see Ken in Ellie and in her picture.
Thank you, Jeannie, for that reminder to look for Ken. It’s a beautiful way to remember those who have gone before.
Hot Dogs and Marmalade 
A good tribute!
What a beautifully wrought eulogy. I then read yours to your brother and there are definite threads between them. Both beautiful. Both unique. Like the men they celebrate.
It’s funny how similar the eulogies are because I know how different the men were. Stewart was an intellectual, while Ken was very hands-on. I remember him taking apart engines and putting them back together when he was quite young — and he always had a box of leftover parts. Stewart was a lawyer and pastor, while Ken was a stone mason. Yes — both very unique and special.
I heard yesterday that a dear friend has passed. His daughter has asked me to write something for his service on Monday which I won’t be able to attend. Jesus (he was Basque) was also unique and special and leaves indelible fingerprints on many hearts. I hope I can produce something as meaningful and true to him as you both did with the two very different men you wrote for.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ll pray you find the right words to honor him.
Thank you, Sally 🙏