family · gratitude · Life

TToT — January 18

  1. The Moon — when I left the house a little after 5 AM Wednesday, I had to pause to take a picture of it. The corona, the clouds — all so lovely.

2. A quote from Art and Fear (by David Bayles and Ted Orland) —
wanting to be understood is a basic need… The risk is fearsome; in making your real work you hand the audience the power to deny the understanding you seek; you hand them the power to say, ‘you’re not like us; you’re weird; you’re crazy.‘”
I have always thought that my biggest fear is failure. The authors are correct though. My biggest fear is not being understood and therefore not fitting in. This is the fear that mean girls target with their posse-mentality — and I’ve learned that mean girls exist at all ages.

3. Encouraging comments — this ties in with #2. I wrote a poem (Phoenix) which I hesitated to post because it’s …um… different. Okay, okay — it’s weird. It starts off with the word “phlying” and has some homophones thrown in. Also a backwards spelling of the word Phoenix which made sense to me as the Phoenix rising from the ashes. Well, the post sat there with no comment on the oddities. How polite, I thought. What a bomb, I thought. Until a little flurry of comments on phlying. So I’m thankful for Leslie Scoble, D. Avery, Sarah David, and crazy4yarn2. You encourage me.

4. A $5 tip — For the record, we don’t take tips at work other than workout tips because we’re a fitness facility. Yesterday, I helped a man with his membership. When we were done, he pulled out his wallet and put a five dollar bill on my desk.
“I can’t take that,” I said.
“I’m not taking it back,” he said.
We were at a stalemate. He told me a long story about how he likes to help people.
“Use that to help somebody else,” he said. “It’s five bucks. I’m not going to miss it and I’m not taking it back.”
Reluctantly, I put it in my drawer. Now I have to come up with a way to help somebody with five dollars — a fun challenge.

5. A new friend — I got together last night with a woman I met at a Christmas party. She is only in town occasionally, but when we first met, we had so much in common. Two introverted moms in the midst of changes in their lives. I’m glad it worked out that we could meet and talk again.

6. An old friend — I ran into one of my oldest friends (as in years I’ve known her) that I hadn’t seen in a long time. Thirty-five years ago, people used to confuse us for each other — and we have some great stories about that. So so so good to see her.

7. Another unpleasant situation that ended with an apology — Suffice it to say that I needed to speak with a member about an unkind thing she had done. In gathering information about our policies at the facility, another staff member said, “Oh, her. She’s terrible. We may have to kick her out.” Later, I ran into the woman in the hallway. This was our conversation:

Me: You’re just the person I was looking for!
Her: Really? What’s going on? What did I do now?
I recounted the situation to her.
Her: I am so sorry. Sometimes I speak without thinking. I didn’t mean to come across that way.
Me: It’s okay. I just wanted you to know how it DID come across.
Her: I’m really sorry. I will try not to do it again.

Sometimes people just need a chance. I’m willing to give her another one.

8. Fasting — I did a 24 hour fast and it’s amazing how good that feels for the body.

9. A message from my cousin letting me know that her father, my uncle, is “slowing down.” I will plan a trip to see him. I’d much rather get that message and have a chance to visit than what the message could have been.

10. Flowers — a member gave me flowers for my desk as a thank you. I LOVE fresh flowers.

gratitude

TToT – January 11, 2025

Ten things for which I have been thankful over this past week:

  1. Writing: I actually posted every day. I hope I didn’t just jinx myself.
  2. Pensée of the day: “People are generally better persuaded by the reasons which they have themselves discovered than by those which have come into the mind of others.” (Blaise Pascal) I read it this morning and was so appropriate for a situation I’m dealing with. I could attempt to strong-arm, but I’ll wait for the other person to arrive at the correct conclusion.
  3. Aiden — I was delighted to get to know one of my newer co-workers. He’s a young man, roughly the same age as my youngest child, with a shy smile and a desire to learn. The circumstances that broke the ice between us were less than desirable — I was called in to work on Sunday morning because of trouble they were having with the computers — but I can honestly say that I’m glad it happened. Yesterday, as I was leaving, Aiden said to me, “I’m sorry if I bother you with too many questions.” “You can never ask too many questions,” I told him. I think we’re going to get along well.
  4. Jean Johnson died last Sunday. I knew her from the 8 AM service I usually attend, but, I have to confess, I didn’t really know her. I’ve spent time this week working on her funeral bulletin and getting to know her posthumously. I wish I had made the effort earlier.
  5. Tissue; So Close but Out of Reach — a tanka submission for the W3 challenge that made me laugh. Funny, clever, true.
  6. A new swim friend — A week or two ago I sold a membership to a young man who I assumed was like 97.6% of the young men who join, wanting to head straight to the weights. Instead, I saw him in the pool. Between you and me, he’s a pretty terrible swimmer. I’ve ended up swimming in the lane next to him and I try not to judge. One day this week, I had stopped to put my fins on and he was resting in the next lane over, when he initiated a conversation with me. “You’re a good swimmer,” he said. “I’ve been doing it for about a hundred years,” I replied. “How do I get better?” he asked. I gave him a few tips which he immediately tried. Now, whenever I see him in the pool he gives me a big smile and wave and shows me his stroke. He has a great smile; someday, maybe he’ll have a great freestyle, too.
  7. Snow. It’s pretty. It’s just awfully cold.
  8. My messy desk. Albert Einstein said, “If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?” My mind is far from empty.
  9. Ham and Scalloped Potatoes. I dug out my recipe and made some this week. They were delicious.
  10. A chance encounter with Annie Halvorsen, an old friend whose art I LOVE! I had gone out to eat and walked past her on my way out. I did a double-take, said hello, and had a lovely conversation with her.
Les Platanes #2 by Annie Halvorsen
gratitude

TToT — January 4, 2025

Ten things for which I have been thankful over this past week:

  1. New Year’s Eve games — If you didn’t get to play games with 5 year old New Year’s Eve, you missed out. We played Magnetic, which involved magnets and strategy, Hurry Up Chicken Butt, which is like Hot Potato with a twist, and The Sneaky, Snacky Squirrel, which had game pieces shaped like acorns. Betcha I had more fun than the people who got rained on in Times Square.
  2. Morning Reading — Here’s a quote from Art and Fear, By David Bayles — “…becoming an artist consists of learning to accept yourself, which makes your work personal, and in following your voice, which makes your work distinctive.”
  3. Best comment/conversation on my blog — with Kristin (Finding Eliza) following my Unicorn Challenge story “The Big House” —
    Kristin: Did he get away with it? If so, then what?
    Me: Ah, but that is the fun of a 250 word limit. Your imagination has to take over now.
    Kristin: Grandad and grandson go on to become the robin hood jewel thieves of whatever country they’re in. Stealing from the wealthy and starting a string of food pantries and soup kitchens for the down and out. Eventually they expand and buy big houses to house the homeless. The well known ballad “They did it for us” was based on them.
  4. New word learned: whinge. Whinge definition: British : to complain fretfully : whine (Thank you, CEAyr. I will TRY to stop whinging.)
  5. Sgeoil’s ode to the Sun
  6. Last night’s crescent moon with Venus very visible next to it.
  7. A difficult decision that I made. Once something is decided, it’s so much easier, right?
  8. A long swim on Thursday. Everything feels better after a swim – my hip and my psyche being most affected in a positive way.
  9. Cats — It’s so nice to be greeted when I walk in the door.
  10. Adam — one of my friends from the gym. He sent me this video of comedian that is one of his personal friends. It made me smile.

#TToT

gratitude

Starting #TToT

One of the other bloggers who participates in The Unicorn Challenge, Clark from The Wakefield Doctrine, posts Ten Things of Thankful (TToT) every Saturday. He actually mentioned ME a time or two — when he liked the piece I had written for The Unicorn Challenge — which took me by surprise, but also got me scanning the list each week.

Looking ahead to 2025, I want to be more thankful. Life has been hard and pity parties are so easy to attend. I have other resolutions that I’ll post in a few days, but I’m going to start to today with this one: Post Ten Things of Thankful (#TToT) on Saturdays as a look-back on specific moments in my week.

My Ten Things of Thankful will NOT be things like FAMILY — even though I’m incredibly thankful for my incredible family — or MY JOB — even though I am mostly thankful for both my jobs. No — I’ll give you specific moments for which I am thankful.

  1. The 96 Chair Debacle — When an order for 24 chairs showed up as 24 BOXES of chairs (4 chairs in each box), I felt slightly panicked. They had been ordered for the senior program and I wasn’t sure where the error was. In the meantime, 24 boxes of chairs filled the lobby space. A little bit of problem solving and we all laughed. I am thankful for laughter. And an excess of chairs.
  2. Ready to crawl — I saw my newest granddaughter on Christmas Day on all fours, rocking, and smiling up at me when I went to retrieve her from a nap. Very cute.
  3. Woodstoves — I house/cat sat for a friend who has a woodstove. What a cozy source of heat! I love sitting by the stove and reading.
  4. Paid vacation — Do you remember the first time you were able to take paid vacation? I do. Forty-some years later it has not lost its luster. I took Monday off as a vacation day, then had Tuesday-Wednesday as paid holidays. With the weekend preceding those three days, it meant that I had FIVE days off in a row, three of which were paid. Heaven.
  5. Christmas dinner — On Christmas Day, my oldest daughter hosted the dinner. It’s always a joy to sit down to eat with family — four of my children, one spouse, one grandhcild, my brother, and one close family friend.
  6. Rum balls — Those rum balls given to me by a member/friend (I mentioned them in my Christmas 2024 post) have been AMAZING. He should add that much rum every time.
  7. A dead mouse — Yes, you read that right. I walked into my bedroom the other night and there was that distinctive “dead” smell. I was still house/cat sitting at that point, so I didn’t have to sleep in the room (yet), but I got out a flashlight and searched for the culprit. No luck. The next few nights I stayed in one of the other bedrooms and searched when I could. Today I cleaned. And cleaned. And cleaned. I still can’t find it. But I AM thankful for a much cleaner room!
  8. Swimming — only another swimmer would probably understand that Zen-feeling of swimming laps. I started swimming again because my hip is hurting, but it provides mental health as much as hip relief. Thankful for the pool, the ability to swim, and an aching hip that drove me back to the water.
  9. Brooks Chicken — I love Brooks Chicken! It’s a local barbecue chicken place. One of my co-workers retired and it was the chosen fare for his retirement party this past week. I was thrilled. If you’re ever in upstate New York, I highly recommend checking it out.
  10. Bowling — My 5 year old granddaughter came to where I work and went bowling yesterday. It was SO nice to see her and the whole family!
Bowling with a 5 year old